Perfectly Imperfect

Perfectionism... Often the bane of my existence!  I'm sure I'm not completely alone in this, the constant battle to have the perfectly kept house, the healthy (yet tasty) meals on the table, the right clothes, the right figure... The list could go on and on. And although these things I actually enjoy sensibly aspiring to, there is one area of my 'perfectionism' that I have come to realise is not going to end well... Parenting. Time after time, I've found myself frustrated with myself. If I'm parenting like A, B & C, then why are my children still battling in different areas?  I've felt like a failure when I've come upon issues with my children that I don't seem to be able to 'fix'.  You see the perfectionist in me, says "I should be able to fix this, change this, make this perfect". Thankfully, God freely gives wisdom to all who ask for it & about 3 months ago, in a moment of desperation & feeling like I had run out of steam to guide one of my boys through a challenge, I felt God reassure me & say "I (referring to himself) am the perfect parent, and even my children make mistakes and don't always follow my advice". Hello! Here's little old 29 year old me... Thinking that through my best parenting efforts, my children will avoid bad choices & sail through life's challenges (hello... I should re read my robots blog post!). Don't get me wrong I 100% believe that the way we parent has a huge impact on our children's lives & has the potential to set them up well in life, the difference is, taking the pressure off ourselves to be the perfect parent & from feeling like there will always be a right or wrong way to fix every problem... And perhaps even going as far as to say, that sometimes the problem is not ours to fix. Now, 3 months on from changing the expectations I have on myself as a parent, my husband recently commented to me that I'm the happiest he's ever seen me. And I truly am. Reflecting on this made me realise how much pressure I had put on myself & how much responsibility I would take for my children's choices. I would encourage any other parents reading this who have perfectionism tendencies, to do as I have, learn to live in the grey, everything doesn't have to be black & white. Our children's battles are an opportunity for us to come along side them, not to always take the reigns. Many blessings, Deni